Been awhile...

Usually my blogs are my rants... but lately, I have had nothing to rant about. Taking off work has definitely been a load off my shoulders as I get the house home (sounds funny) put together before Garrett returns from deployment.

We finally have a homecoming date, which I am sure will change 500 times before he returns. But we did get e-mails for the cut-offs of sending packages and all that goodness.

We are at a point with our deployment where we are both frustrated with how there's barely any time left! I think because there is so little time left that we feel comfortable talking about it... which means we are talking about it... which means we are frustrated over it! :) Oo military life...

Definitely still the happiest couple on the planet! Staying positive through this madness of a seven months, but it is only preparing us for the rest of our lives :)

Today's wise...... :)

Stop berating yourself for being a work in progress. – Start embracing it!  Because being a work in progress doesn’t mean you’re not good enough today.  It means you want a better tomorrow, and you wish to love yourself completely, so you can live your life fully.  It means you’re determined to heal your heart, expand your mind and cultivate the gifts you know you’re meant to share. May we all be works in progress forever, and celebrate the fact that we are!

This is so true… Whether people like to see it through their own eyes or not, you can be the only person to live in your shoes. If you are succeeding slowly but surely, EMBRACE IT!

I feel like deployment has made me as a person, a work in progress all over again. Not that deployment is over yet, but since half way, it feels like a downhill battle from now on! One thing I learned through out this experience is that everyone will handle deployment in their own ways. There is no advice on what to do that will make ALL the pain go away. People will judge. People will say you are wrong. People will admire you. People will be there for you. The most important thing, is that you are there for yourself. 

Start making your own happiness a priority. – Your needs matter.  If you don’t value yourself, look out for yourself, and stick up for yourself, you’re sabotaging yourself.  Remember, it IS possible to take care of your own needs while simultaneously caring for those around you.  And once your needs are met, you will likely be far more capable of helping those who need you most.

The dreadful line...

One of the most important things I am learning through this deployment is our fine line between what to and what not to communicate. And by that, I do not mean lie about, I mean what to not make him stress over. It is hard when I am here and I can’t see what is happening there. I don’t know what his work schedule is. I don’t know how many people lied to him today. I don’t know what he had to re-do because the first plan didn’t work. All I can see is what I am going through. And how I don’t have that physical support that I am used to. He isn’t here to help me buy my new car. He isn’t here to help me with my medical issues when he is the best person to take care of me when I am sick! And worst of all, I am not there for him! I told him tonight that I feel upset over a our last conversation, and I wanted to share his “deployed insight” of why he may not be as verbally supportive.  

“im sorry kobie. i know your doing a good job. i have nothing to worry about back home and its all because you are on top of everything. im so proud of you and so amazed by what you do. im not used to having to say it tho. i dont say it at work because we are just asked to do our job. we dont get praised here and im in work mode all the time because thats my main job right now. im sorry that it seems like im ignoring what your doing but im not. i tell my friends all the time how much you do for me and how much you care. your all i talk about over here”

I am so glad the person I have to share my life with, is someone I can talk to and grow with from our conversations rather then let things linger and worsen! Yet again I have realized I was way before crossing that line, and I probably should have told my hubs a while ago before a problem occurred :) Still learnin that line!

Random fact of my day: 

If you are too hydrated, it could give you trouble sleeping! I always have trouble sleeping. Usually I take ambien because I need the push. Today I read that cherry juice contains melatonin. For those who don’t know what melatonin is, it is a hormone that helps you sleep :) A natural way is always a better way because you can train your body by using it’s full potential with no addictions! 

Halfway mark!!!

Today is my halfway day for deployment!!! (according to Garrett's ETA of course!)

Just thinking about everything that needs to get done before he comes home! I cannot wait :))) I think I have enough going on to keep me busy and positive for the next few months. I booked my last vacation before Garrett comes home. Every year about 40 of my friends go on a cruise to Ensenada and this year may very well be my last! I am definitely ok with parting from this tradition because the grass on the other side is greener and brighter.

I got to talk to Garrett this morning for 15 minutes online. He said he wouldn't be on again until tomorrow. I told him "That's so far away!" (only because we have barely talked the past three weeks!) and he said "but you know I am ok".   -______-  Men.

Tonight I will be celebrating! And it is perfect timing because bevmo has zins for 33% off :)

Post melt down ramble...

It’s relaxin time!

I feel like today I was ran through the washing machine! I want to say that deployment is mentally exhausting. I literally shut my brain down as of four hours ago. I am tired of talking to people, tired of handling accounts with a power of attorney, tired of work stress, tired of apartment shopping… I think it’s safe to say, I am tired! 

What helps when this happens? A great nights sleep! An ambien induced sleep! Since it’s hard to sleep with things on your mind (and a military wife’s mind is never at ease), I like to use sleep aids so the next day, I am stronger and able to handle bigger situations at a more relaxed time. 

I am so excited to soon be signing our lease to our new apartment! No more staying with family for deployment! Just Garrett and I, and Duke of course ;) We get to make our own plans. We get to live how we want to. We run everything about our lives. 

Thinking about Garrett tonight. Thinking about the romantic things I wish I had when he was here and I was spoiled. Thinking about the time I had a medical situation with medicine that made it not possible to drink alcohol. That night Garrett came home with a bottle of magicale that he had to walk into Disneyland to get… and I was mad because he wasn’t paying attention to my issue -______-. Man I sure would kill to go back to that night! 

Deployment has taught me more than enough… but one thing I will never forget, is too take advantage of our moments together! 

Thinking of you tonight 

We took so many pictures! But I will never have enough! 

<3

Disneyland, family and friends....

ALL DEPLOYMENT LONGGGG <3

D

Introducing to blogspot :D

My name is Kobie, and I am married to my wonderful husband Garrett. He is currently in Afghanistan serving in the USMC. We are stationed at Pendelton for now. Hoping to be on the east coast by November 2012 :) We are planning our wedding for August of 2012! We have a pug named Duke and he is 5 years old! I absolutely LOVE pugs.

For now, most of my posts are dealing with deployment/ military/ whatever is on my mind that I don't feel like talking about because the one person I do want to talk to is not here! Or photography things! I LOVE photography and I try to shoot everything everywhere I go to keep my memories with me :)